January 6th, 2015 It was one of those dreams that you had, where you knew you were slowly waking up- yet you forced your eyes shut even harder because you wanted to cling to whatever fleeting reality your subconscious had created. Possibly not even because you like the dream, you just can’t help but want to know how it ends. She saw him, across the road in the busy city that she didn’t recognize, and she reached out to him, hoping to draw his attention. It had been four years since she had seen that face yet she knew she could spot it anywhere in a crowd. Maybe it’s our minds yearning for the memory, or desperately hoping that somehow, our deepest desires might alight. We don’t hold back when dreaming. Our subconscious has a direct line to our hearts, and who is to say that if our brain wasn’t there to keep our mouths from holding the words back, that we would do anything other than speak exactly how we feel? There was a large transit bus that suddenly flew by as she approached the street to get closer- pushing her back and forcing her to lose eye contact. As she glanced up, the man was gone. She looked quickly, from side to side- Did he cross the street? Maybe she’d see him again? When all of a sudden her limbs were frozen as the busy traffic continued all around her. She tried to speak, but alas no words left her mouth. She tried to scream, but all she heard was the internal screaming in her head as she started to feel her increased heart beat. She consciously became aware of her arms at her side as she laid in bed. She still could not open her eyes, nor could she move her arms. She felt tears leave the sides of her eyes slowly but surely. She gasped as her eyes flew open and she found herself drenched in a cold sweat. She knew him. She knew that man. She did not know how she knew him.
But simply because she did not know him yet.